Thursday, March 11, 2010

'OLD' - THE FORBIDDEN WORD

WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #7 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
'OLD' - THE FORBIDDEN WORD

I have friends who get angry when I mention the word 'old'.
If we are out and about, meeting new folks and I say the forbidden word 'old' in reference to myself,
I get accused of being 'negative', 'depressing' and even 'ruining things'. What things?

Warrior Women
Many of us battle aging.
We fight it on various fronts:
- cosmetic surgery
- coloring grey hair
- covering thinning hair with extensions, pieces, and whatever we can find
- dressing like 20 year olds
- dating much younger partners
You get the picture.
Of course, we all have seen men our age strolling along with their toddlers.
What are they thinking? Or are they?
What are we thinking?   Or are we?

PC Police
BTW, this avoidance of the word 'old' is not only happening with some of my friends.
I have been informed that the language police consider it politically incorrect to say 'getting old'.
Instead, we are supposed to use 'aging'. Yeah right, surely that makes it all ok. Get over yourself.
It's silly to ban words and stifle speech.
After all, it is what it is.

How Annoying
Along with denial and pc codes, ridiculous platitudes seriously get on my last nerve.
Do you find these as annoying as I do?
Here are a few:
- Age is just a number
- You are as old as you feel
- 60 is the new - what age is being touted now - oh yeah 50, or is it 30?
Please stop !!!

How come
If 60 is the new 40 (or whatever):
- my knees will not easily skip down a flight of stairs. (Ouch they hurt).
- that little black dress is not so little. (Is yours?)
- names, titles of songs, trains of thought, etc get lost in the void of vanishing memory (uuhhh...what was I saying?)

FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Myriad factors influence the aging process, including genetics, lifestyle and most profoundly, attitude.

UNHOMEWORK
What platitudes about aging get on your nerves? Why?
Do you use the word 'old' when referring to yourself or your friends?
If not, what descriptive label, if any, do you use?
Do you reveal your true age?
If so, what reaction do you expect, e.g. shock, disbelief, responses such as:
'no way can you be 58' or 'I thought you were 40'?
Do you fib about your age? If so, how many years do you shave off? Why?

NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
BEFORE EMERGING AS A SWAMP GODDESS


         Before emerging as Swamp Goddess, I comically referred to my budding menopausal/midlife self as.......

HELPFUL HINTS
Factors that influence the aging process will be addressed in future postings.
Midlife Memos is a weekly blog.
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NOTES
CONTACT INFORMATION
Email:                  www.drwendykyman@gmail.com
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