WELCOME TO MIDLIFE MEMOS
THE SWAMP GODDESS® GUIDE TO MENOPAUSAL MAYHEM AND AGING ANGST
BLOG #59 by Wendy Kyman, Ph.D.
MIDLIFE FRIENDSHIP FALLOUT
Our breakup with a friend affects others.
Usually, we were either part of a large group or shared a couple of mutual friends.
The breakup of a relationship creates dilemmas for those other friends.
Tension mounts when our friends plan activities.
If a mutual friend wants company - dinner, movie, weekend getaway - she wonders if
you will get upset if she invites your new non-friend.
Your friend wonders if it wise to invite both you and your non-friend.
Ummm - no!
Your mutual friend's anxiety increases when she plans a major celebratory occasion.
She has to determine whether to invite both non-friends.
If not, which of the non-friends gets omitted from the guest list?
How will you react if it's you who gets left out?
FOOD FOR THOUGHT
Mutual friends may attempt to get us to reconcile with our new non-friend.
They may be tempted to arrange meetings to get us together.
Frankly, it easier for them if you and your non-friend reconcile.
Do you participate in group activities if one of your non-friends is present?
Why? Why not?
Describe your response if well meaning friends set up a meeting with your new non-friend.
What is the best way to tell your mutual friends to, 'butt out?'
NEXT WEEK'S TOPIC
... alliances get formed when ...
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